Chapter One, CHIHUAHUAS

Chihuahuas are not like a box of chocolates.  You almost always know what you are going to get.  These little dogs that fit into purses and pockets so well, have a tendency to turn into whirling balls of razors upon entering a healthcare facility, without fail.  Occasionally, there will be a nice one, a rare incident, but it does happen.  Once in a while, you do bite into a chocolate that is filled with caramel and not the horrible gelatinous fruit filled kind.

Maria has two chihuahuas that are coming in on one sunny and hot afternoon.  We weren’t sure what we were going to get, but, then again, we did know.  They did not disappoint.  First of all, they were wheeled in via a double stroller.  We all oohed and aahed over how adorable their ridiculous chariot was.  As if that weren’t enough, they also had sunglasses on.  Sunglasses.   Dog sunglasses look like swimming goggles with tinted lenses.  It was borderline horrifying.  So, there they sat, in their stroller with these sunglasses strapped to their faces, all zipped in behind a screen that kept them safely within the confines of their carriage.  Again, the staff swooned at the adorableness of everything that was going on in this buggy.  Honestly, none of that stuff is cute, we all agreed on that immediately, but that’s neither here nor there.

It came time to unzip these pups and start the veterinary process.  Two fingers gently grasped the zipper and, sure enough, Fluffcake and Punkin began viciously biting and snapping at them from the other side of the screen.  Maria interjected with, “You just need to point and say no firmly, they’ll stop”.  Yeah, they’re not going to stop.  They didn’t stop.  We had to break out the leather lined gloves and blankets just to retrieve them from their nest.  Their sunglasses flew off in the fray, beads were dropping all over the floor, where were the beads coming from?!  Maria actively struggled to put their goggles back on while exclaiming, “the fluorescent lights, the babies can’t take it!” all while we are just trying to not get bitten.  They also had dresses on that Maria had undoubtedly bedazzled herself, this is where the mystery beads came from, and this made it extremely difficult to hold them with the blankets.  Once Maria was able to secure their goggles back on and they were extracted from their stroller, things became much calmer and the visit commenced at a much calmer pace.  

We all breathed a sigh of relief as their visit drew to a close and the hands on part was done.  

“Do you have any more questions or concerns, Maria?”

“Well, actually, could you check their back molars again?  One of them might have a loose tooth but I can’t remember which one.”

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